Live for the moment

Net worth of a Network

2011-06-15T12:47:00.001-07:00

Any sort of relationship forms the solid platform for an individual's personal as well as social evolution. Seldom has relationships been measured or friendships acknowledged in all senses than through the mass movement that is currently sweeping our country. Yes, Social networking has changed the way we communicate and revolutionized the way we relate to people. Orkut, Facebook, Ibibo, Twitter, Linkedin....the names are numerous and the rate of evolution is growing faster with each passing day. It is indeed an era of the internet revolution and social networking has become the brand icon for this revolution with its evident visibility.

Back in the days, a friendship always started with a "Hi" or "Hello", a gentle smile on the face and a hand shake with assurance. At certain junctures, a hug is an added element in the process. This was followed by regular meetings, hanging out at various cool spots catering to the tastes of the individuals and gradually accommodating each other. All this involved a clear involvement of our physical senses. Social networking changed the equation quite a bit. The physical senses were not important anymore nor was the individual behind a name. Handshakes were replaced by the finger shakes on the keyboard with rapid tapping matched probably by a tap dancer on the stage. The smile which took actual exertion of the muscles was now easy and effortless in two symbols on the keyboard ":" and ")". The self introductions which lay the platform for the friendship has now shrunk to three letters "asl". The age, sex and location of the person matters more than anything. It always puzzled me because neither of the three factors hold any value as we dont have any definite idea about the physical existence of the person. Well, I guess the cyber world sometimes bridges the gap between the "real" and "virtual" and helps us live out our fantasies. It is an easy wall to hide behind and still plot your story according to your wish. The perfect way to feel good about yourself. Yes, for me,socialnetworking has always been the perfect platform for an alter ego to satisfy your real ego.

Relationships in the social networks are more or less like bubbles floating around in the sky. The light shimmers through them creating a range of colors around them but all it takes it a simple poke to burst. I always wondered how people find it difficult to trust anybody in real life but find it easier to do it over a social network. Information about themselves, irrespective of whether it is fake or real, is shared and numerous sessions of chat without significance to any particular relevant topic happens over a period of time. One of the most interesting observations that I had while accessing these social networking sites is that, a person might not even think about somebody throughout the year, but when the notification of the birthday comes in, he is quick to wish the person with a lot of love and prayers and in a short span of time, the birthday boy/girl's wall (as in facebook) or any similar medium is filled with messages and greetings. A day to celebrate my existence on this planet turns out to a day where I am showered with an exaggerated display of love and affection and a spontaneous interest in my presence all over again, after almost a year. So much for the strength of a relationship bonded by a social network.

To sum it up, reality takes a back seat and individuality is hidden inside the chest of drawers as you log into one of these networks. The password typed in forms the key to a rather superficial existence in an extremely make believe environment. When a status message put by you saying "I am feeling lonely and sad" is virtually "liked" by a couple of your online friends and then some of them follow it up with concerned enquiries as to what happened, you start questioning the credibility behind the person. I wish for a day when people log out of these social networking sites and get out into the open to meet each other, look each other in the eye and share each other's heart. Even whilesocialnetworking is indeed a good step to save time and energy, I still believe our planet requires something which is much more important - actual human interaction. The world lacks emotions now and it is time to stop emoting through emoticons :)

Be a part of my world....

2011-04-26T14:30:00.000-07:00

On the first glance, the title does sound like an invitation for a probable life partner. But, my world is not about love or about marriage alone. My world is something more visual and seen through my eyes. So, this invitation is for you to be part of that visual journey in my life.

Photography has always been a liberating experience for my mind and I see it as a means of letting others see the world through my eyes. I keep saying that photographers are the fortunate lot because we are capable of donating our eyes while we are still alive. The photographer lets others see the world through his eyes. It is time for me to do so and also invite a few of the younger crop to be a part of the mission too.

I am holding my second photography exhibition from May 16 - 19 at Museum Hall, Trivandrum. My first exhibition conducted as a project for the Trivandrum Zoo and featuring photographs of zoo animals was a success. It was featured in the leading newspapers and also covered by the channels.

http://www.hindu.com/mp/2009/10/15/stories/2009101550940100.htm

This time around, I am aiming at doing the exhibition for presenting my portfolio and using one of the exhibition days as a launching platform for young aspiring photographers to feature their best work along with my exhibition. It is an open invitation and the photographer will get the chance to interact with the crowd and the media.

The criteria is quite simple. You can send me two of your best photographs along with your name, age, your occupation and the story behind the photographs. I personally believe that no photograph is a blank note and that each click carries a story with it. So, briefly explain your story for the two photographs and mail it to me at arun.kunjunny@gmail.com. Chosen 40 or 50 photographs depending on the space availability will be featured for a full day along with my photographs. So, a group of 20 - 25 photographers get a free platform to exhibit their work and interact with the crowd. Do send in your low resolution pics latest by 11th of May and I will let you know the selected photographs by 13th May.

Lets celebrate the art of photography and join hands in this visual expedition.

Wildlife Photography - a Maverick's eye!!!

2009-07-24T03:48:00.000-07:00

“A great photograph is one that fully expresses what one feels, in the deepest sense, about what is being photographed”, remarked Ansel Adams, the renowned American photographer famous for his landscape frames. I do believe in it and when my good buddy asked me to write an informal article about my view about photography, especially bordering on wildlife photography , I thought of it as a medium to reach out to each one of you who appreciate photography as an art. Before beginning, let me tell you that I am not a photographer but to put it in simple terms, I am addicted to life and the world around me and I tend to copy the best among the whole lot into my camera.

Having worked in Stock Photography firms both international and Indian, I have had the oppurtunity of interacting via email or in person, with more than a thousand photographers. It was my job but it paved the way for me to understand the mindset of some of the best in the business. People generally make two big misinterpretations when it comes to photography. First of all, a lot of people give too much emphasis on the technical aspect of photography. Now, please do understand the fact that it is not photography which has the technical side to it but the camera. So, when photographers say about the technical aspect of photography, they are more or less referring to the technical understanding of the equipment. The second more common misinterpretation is that a professional photographer automatically classifies as an individual who clicks perfect pictures. For your understanding, the word professional is more of a tag which emphasizes the fact that the individual who gathers monetary benefit out of photography. It does not mean that he is the final word in photography. So, don’t be intimidated or disappointed by the works of so-called professional photographers. On a given day on a subject of your choice, you might very well be able to take a better photograph than an established photographer. I have experienced that first hand.

For any type of photography, a few points can be noted which would fall under the “To know and do” list. From this point on, when I speak about camera, it is essentially about the SLR cameras only.

To know and do list

· Study your camera and the technical details associated with it well. A photographer without a sound knowledge of his equipment is like a guitarist, who doesn’t know how to tune his guitar. No matter how skilled he is in playing, the sound will still be awful!

· Choose the right lenses for each shoot and clean them and test them regularly to avoid any confusions during the moment of the shoot.

· Choose a shooting posture wherein you are comfortable and most stable. Practice that posture regularly as a drill if possible so that for a quick click, your body automatically takes up that posture without delay. Ideally, I would advise the hand holding the camera to be in full contact with the chest on shooting posture, to avoid any vibration or movement.

· Learn to change lenses effectively and quickly, alone. Make sure that the lens removal process is efficient with no dust entering the sensors.

· Carry weather resistant bags or covers. You never know what kind of weather you might run into and should not essentially risk your equipment. Plastic covers are also good, as it could provide protection from rain.

· Check the settings of the camera before the shoot. The format for shooting, the in-camera sharpening, the metering etc has to be checked and confirmed before the shoot. Preparation is always nice as it keeps you disciplined and in a better position to shoot effectively without hiccups.

· Ensure that the batteries are charged, well in advance. You do not want to go on a shoot with batteries that are not fully charged. The chances are likely that you will end up missing important frames due to a camera without power.

· The camera straps are to be ideally put round the neck while shooting. In my case, it restricts my movement with the camera and so, strap is hooked onto my forearm and wound twice to avoid loosing its grip. Again, it depends on your convenience.

· A sound knowledge of an editing software, preferably Adobe Photoshop is a bonus. It is not always that you get what you strived for and if some minor corrections can conver the frame to your liking, it is always best to go for it. As a rule, I believe that a photographer has to like the subject he shoots, then like the output from it before he can expect others to probably like it too.

These are few of the basic things that can be kept in mind and these are in no way the final or the absolute list of things to do. As I said, this article is my perspective and should not be interpreted on a factual manner. I never had a guru in photography and the passion towards the art of photography combined with an addictive enthusiasm for learning from whatever source available, made me a photographer.

Let’s ponder a bit about Wildlife photography now, as I tend to favour that area of photography as my niche. Even though the term "Wildlife photography" is used, it is in a more broader sense and tend to refer to shooting any life forms other than human beings and plants. In short, there might be references to domestic animals also in the same context as a tiger or eagle.

Wildlife photography is tricky in many ways. It will be given the second rank when it comes to the difficulty level in getting a perfect image. Of course, the first rank would go to landscape photography. As Ansel Adams himself put it, “Landscape photography is the supreme test of the photographer - and often the supreme disappointment.” With photography involving human subjects inside a studio or even outdoors, the photographer does enjoy some liberties, with the subjects being in their control. If it is inside a studio, it is all the more comfortable because then the lighting is also controllable. However, with wildlife photography, practically nothing is in your control and most of the times, your intuition as a person and your affinity towards mother nature is what would help you most of the time. Along the course of this article, I would show you some sample images too to help you understand this aspect better.

It is indeed ironical that during numerous treks to almost all forests in my state ,as a nature conservationist, I never had a camera with me. When it comes to wildlife photography, I do feel that it is essential to have a good zoom lens with VR (Vibration Reduction). I use a base zoom lens (75-300mm), which does not really serve the purpose with respect to quality of the image or efficiency in operation during wildlife shoots. So, if you are ready to burn your pockets, get yourself a very good zoom lens where the price range could be above 25000Rs for sure.

For this article, I am using pictures taken from the local zoo here to introduce you to some basic points concerned with wildlife photography. Throughout this article, the emphasis is not on technical details but on a simple hands-on view to the whole art of wildlife photography. The technical details are always available anywhere but some of the tricks that you learn with experience counts a lot.

1) Learn to observe

Observation is a key element while shooting wildlife. You need to observe your surroundings and need to be alert like a hawk. In the image that follows, the frame has been visualised differently. For a normal person, it would be ideal to wait for the pigeons to fly off or probably settle down before getting the giraffe, mostly right in the center of the frame. That is indeed a very normal way of shooting. Of course, you have come to the zoo to get a picture of the giraffe and that is what is important. But, look at the frame below and you will notice that even with the pigeons flying around, the focus is still on the giraffe. The addition of the pigeons add a life to the image and does not make it a simple giraffe in a rectangle. Observe for such minor modifications that you can naturally bring into the frame and it could work wonders in the final output.

2) Choose a good frame

Framing has always been considered as an important element of photography. On simple terms, it essentially refers to your judgement on the placement of the subject in your camera’s grid. For me, framing is again not a science based on squares in a rectangular space but more to do with your eye and sense of order. For a normal person, the important aspect would be to capture the subject in focus and generally, that would mean to capture the subject right on the dead center of the frame. It is good to do it but most of the times, such a frame would actually look lifeless. In the image below, the first point mentioned above came into play where the observation happened that the owls were sitting in a quite unique formation. Then, for framing, if the owls were right on the center of the frame, it would not actually show the color blending of the background wall with the owl’s colour. When the owls are shifted to one side of the frame, the colour of the background wall is seen clearly and in turn it projects the owls more in the frame. Also, in the bottom part of the frame, part of the log on which they were sitting is also included. An addition of that log actually gives the image a more realistic and natural look. If the log was not there and just the owls and the background, it would have looked more like a composite image with the owls just pasted on the background.

3) Anticipation and Prediction

It is always nice to study a bit about the animals and birds that you plan to shoot, so that you can know their behavioral patterns and can generally anticipate a reaction and predict a frame. It essentially gets you ready and in 8 times out of 10, you can walk away with a perfect frame. In the image below, as I stood near that open enclosure, the bear was opening its mouth slightly and looking bored overall. Judging by the hot climate, the anticipation came in that an unavoidable rest routine was to follow and a yawn was expected promptly. 10 minutes of waiting got rewarded with the huge yawn seen below. Patience is a virtue my friend and combine it with a love for nature and its inhabitants, you will mostly be gifted with wonderful frames.

4) Thinking out of the box

A good frame is always great but then again inorder to get to that frame, it helps to think out of the box with respect to certain subjects. With animals, you essentially think about capturing their whole form. But, the key element is the animal or bird and how you perceive their character and their impact on this planet. It could be deciding factor on that frame sometimes. In the image below, I could have gone for a complete body shot of the crocodile. But, looking at the light and the proximity to the crocodile, I felt I should tighten the frame and bring out a different angle. In short, with the frame below, it hints at one of the first footsteps to grace this planet and more of a tribute to one of the most ancient and long standing species. It could work in the same way for different other animals like the feathers for a peacock, the eye for an eagle, the claws of a vulture etc. Each of the above mentioned frames uniquely identify that particular animal and could give a totally fresh perspective to your image.

5) Panning and capturing movement

Panning is a very crucial element of wildlife photography. Technically, it is a method to capture fast motion with only the main subject in focus in the foreground. A good knowledge of an animal’s movement pattern can help you anticipate a specific move and help you capture it. It is always useful particularly with hyperactive animals like monkeys and also, birds in flight. The trick is to keep a constant focus on the subject and move the camera along with it without losing the focus. It might appear difficult at first but with constant practice, it would become rather easy. In the image below, the monkey was hunching up as if to jump and all I had to do was ascertain the possible trajectory and have the camera ready to click at the exact moment. With practice, it would become natural to click at the precise moment. Panning works with any moving subjects and can be return extremely wonderful frames especially with birds in flight.

6) Look for good lighting and shadows

Lighting is a very important factor of any type of photography and wildlife photography is not different. You can even use it to your advantage with certain subjects and can actually use shadows also to create a more dynamic effect. Make sure that you observe the light and look around to ensure that no shadows are coming over excessively over the subject you are shooting. The best time generally for shooting is early morning or in the evening after 4. It would be really tough to shoot in the afternoons as the sun might be mercilessly bright and giving you results which you might not expect. In the image given below, the light was wonderful in the way it fell on that crocodiles front portion and the shadows that fell on the posterior part of its body gave the whole image a more dynamic and mysterious look. It could make the subject more aggressive or even make it project out more in the frame.

7) Color combinations

It is always nice to observe the color combination in the frame and a careful consideration of such frames can give amazing results. You can see the result of observing color combination in the image of the two owls, given above. Sometimes, minor adjustments in where you stand or maybe even kneeling on the ground can change the background to an extent that the whole frame might look different and appealing. Don’t be hesitant to kneel or even lie on the floor to get a better frame with good colors. I have seen people being embarrassed to do that but remember that you are shooting for yourself and the final output depends on how much effort you put in, to get that good shot. In the image below, a 20 minutes wait by the tiger enclosure got me this frame but I am glad I did since it returned the best photograph ever captured on my camera, to date. The yellow and orange colours of the tiger’s body, blends in perfectly with the green algae infested water. A lot of people had asked me whether compositing was done on the image by placing the tiger later, in the image with just the water in it. Well, that is what a good frame can do to the viewers.

8) Extraordinary in the ordinary

This is again a totally different element to photography and has got to do more with your eye and its perception powers than any technical aspect. You need to train your eye to find excitement in anything that you see around. To put it in simple terms, you should be able to see life in a centipede as much as you see life in a lion. People tend to forget this aspect and look at only certain beings in awe. For me, anything and everything around me surprises me and excites me. This helps because it keeps my senses alert and helps me find beautiful frames in normal scenarios. In the image given below, bats are flying around in a disturbed state. For a normal guy, it might not be special because they are just bats and you get to see them in bunches on the trees. But, to see such a huge flock of bats in flight during broad daylight is indeed special. That makes this frame special and kinda puts it in the extra ordinary category. So, is all in the manner in which you see the world around you. Focus on the world around you in detail and it can get you interesting and surprising results in the frames.

In short, I do agree that technical knowledge is quintessential but when it comes to wildlife photography, but relying more on your instincts and quick response could get you great shots. For subjects which are unpredictable and beyond your control and lighting which could vary drastically in seconds, you don’t have much time to work on the settings to get a perfect shot. You need to have a basic idea, set the camera in advance and make sure that you have already visualized a frame in your mind to enable the click at that perfect moment. Trusting your instincts backed by a good knowledge of the subjects, the location and the equipment along with a little bit of luck can deliver you a good wildlife image.

To end with Ansel Adams’ quote yet again – ““It is my intention to present - through the medium of photography - intuitive observations of the natural world which may have meaning to the spectators.”

Battle in the skies!!!

2008-08-04T20:12:00.000-07:00

Darkness spreads across; it’s time for the war
Fought in heavens above, nature roars in fury,
The warriors dressed up in shades of grey
Lines up in no order, in the wide open skies.

A weapon, fit to kill, may not be,
An army, fit to conquer, may not be,
Urged on by the sound of the mighty thunder,
Lightning provides flashes of the final victory!

Far across the horizons, the way cry is made,
Gray and not blue, is the order of the day,
Time to draw first blood, time to settle the scores,
Time for the heavenly battle, time to get even!

Thunder booms loud, lightning strikes bright,
My eyes travel up, my gaze fixed on the raging battle
The first drop, hits my face giving me a cold jolt
I wonder at the sight! I wonder within!

Is it the blood of the wounded from the violent tussle?
Is it the tear of the lost soldier, sad at the defeat?
As it falls down as a cold shower, I realize..
We are cleansed, cleansed by the battle above!

Human Behaviour

2007-09-12T08:21:00.000-07:00

Human behavior is the collection of activities performed by human beings and influenced by culture, attitudes, emotions, values, ethics, authority, rapport, hypnosis, persuasion, and/or coercion. (courtesy: Wikepedia). We generally tend to take the behavioral patterns of an individual to be the direct result of the harmonized functioning of the brain and the nervous system. But, that concept only looks at the exhibition of the physical behavior. One simple example would be how the body reacts to a very hot object. The feeling of extreme temperature and the pain it would cause due to direct contact has already been embedded in our brain due to first-hand experience of the same or due to the knowledge we have acquired from our society or texts. This would immediately make us wary each time we see a hot object and we will not touch it, at least not with bare hands. But, let’s take another scenario where your dress has caught fire accidentally due to some reason X or Y. If it is a small fire just catching up, we will try to put it off by putting our hands over it and blowing at it. In all probability, we will end up doing both actions. So, even when our brain has been encoded with the knowledge that fire is hot and will burn our body, we will still perform the involuntary action of putting it off with our hands. Here, the mind or what we literally call heart, takes over. The function of the heart or the mind becomes all the more dominant, if the victim is someone close to you.
So, lets analyze the situation better. The brain basically performs the analytical operations for a process and gives a logical solution which transcends into a normal behavioral pattern. The brain relies on the senses mostly, for performing this action. The mind on the other hand relies more on the emotional side of things and logic takes a back seat. It is a good balance between the emotional and mental state of the individual along with the sound logic and perfect analyzing power that contributes to a socially acceptable behavioral pattern. One good example is that of a kid in a public place. When you take a toddler to a cinema hall, where everyone is quiet and still, it is highly unlikely that the kid would follow the behavioral pattern if he is disturbed. At a young age, his brain has not been decoded with the social norms of silence in a place like the cinema hall and the baby is more concerned about his personal issue than the socially accepted behavioral pattern. This is what I would prefer to call raw response. Education actually takes this raw mindset, fine polishes it with rules and other norms and the metamorphosis into a social individual slowly takes place. It is highly unlikely that an adult will cry out aloud, no matter how hungry he is, inside a cinema hall.
To put it precisely, the individual gradually evolves a socially acceptable behavior pattern with age, as a result of education and by observation of his environment. For the sake of discussion, we could consider the case of a mentally challenged person. The brain takes the back seat for them and the mind rules over their actions. In reality, they are very much like small kids. A small kid would drop a glass to see it break and enjoy the sound and the sight of the fragments scattering in different directions. For him, he is experiencing the sensations and actually making a careful observation of the result of the process. This is precisely what a mentally challenged person does. However, just like the kid, I feel that they are just not able to communicate the reason for their actions. Our society labels them as mad individuals, while we sometimes even enjoy a similar behavior pattern from the kid.

Quite contrary to the popular literary coinage, “Where the heart (mind) rules over the brain”, I feel that it should be a proper blend of both, to project a behavioral pattern that would be socially acceptable and personally beneficial.

Journey of Life

2007-09-12T04:12:00.000-07:00

Life is a journey and not a destination…..
Walking along, faces cross you….
You remember some, forget some
Some get etched in your soul

Roads wind in strange patterns before you
Making you think before choosing
Lives get messed up in the final choice
In the end, success comes to clarity of thought

The map for you has been drawn out
The sails have been hoisted
The seas maybe rough, but you are brave
To weather the storm and make the voyage

The land of opportunity awaits you
Waiting for you to lay down the anchor
Ahoy! Captain! All aboard for the trip
The journey has just started……

Be Counted

2007-09-12T04:05:00.000-07:00

Stand up and be counted, forget the past
Seize the day, now, as it is not gonna last
It is time to pick up the pace, the race is fast
Pack your bags, buckle up, for the final blast

Nobody would be concerned about your defeats
Nor would they care for your present feats
Go on and someone will fill the empty seats
It is time now, to follow the heart beats

Failures will not be forgotten, old triumphs aid,
With time, the anger, the worry, will fade,
The wide open road has been laid,
For you, to reach out, the horizon has been made

Buckle up my friend, it is not yet late,
Dont curse your fate, Forget the hate,
Standing and staring on, at the big old gate,
Push it open and walk on, do not wait

Agasthya

2007-09-12T03:39:00.000-07:00

Oh Agasthya! You fill my entire view;
In all respect and devotion, I bow to you,
The swirling cold lusty breeze
Adds on to the dance of the trees.

Mist covering your majestic peak,
An eternal joy, it helps me seek.
Green carpet spread out on land,
Sky spinning up a heavenly strand.

Dancing and quarrelling moves the clouds,
An exotic pleasure, in my heart it moulds.
Comes morning and sun with its ray of light,
But, still you stand with all your might.

Clouds, the warriors, protect the port,
Refusing sunrays, entry into the fort.
Breeze, the maid, massages you,
Bringing mist and covering you from view.

Trees all around you, happily grow,
Your importance, they sure do know.
Birds awakened by the morning light,
Chirping and chattering starts it’s flight.

Animals set out on their daily prowls,
And the forest is filled with occasional growls.
The river gurgles and flows on and on,
With the advent of the sensuous dawn.

How melodious is the bird’s call,
It is enjoyable for one and all.
Come night and the vibrant moon,
Lighting up the place very soon.

Birds have gone on a sleep very full,
The forest singing them a melodious lull.
Life forms are asleep, whatever it takes,
In my mind, happiness sure it makes.

Your peak is sparkling with moonlight,
It sure adds on to the exotic sight.
Darkness and mysticism bring fear,
But, some love can also be found here.

Looking at your peak in the night,
I suddenly realized the eternal right.
Nothing ever has been so beautiful,
Nothing ever gives happiness so full.

I made a walk to your greeny summit,
With love and calmness, like a hermit.
Reaching the site, I was spellbound,
Was this heaven in all universe around?

Suddenly, my vision was gone,
I found mist, thick and dull, spreading on.
Bringing with it, a light rain,
Relieving me of all the pain.

People say, “I came, I saw, I conquered”,
I feel, “I came, I saw, I surrendered”.
But, sad o sad, what happens today?
People forgetting nature day by day.

Trees are being cut down,
Forests are being burnt down.
Rivers ringing with extensive pollution,
Leaving us with no practical solution.

Water in rivers, so crystal clear,
The flowing sound, a pleasure to hear.
Lying in water, itself a pleasure,
Amount of which is difficult to measure.

Surprising; with your peak so tall,
Human beings are made to feel so small.
Life forms view you with utmost devotion,
But, we view you as an object of exploitation.

It is indeed very sad,
That we have become so mad.
Isn’t it nothing but pure insanity?
Destroying something so full of divinity.

Oh Agasthya! Here I make a vow,
Your greatness, I will let others know.
Your role as a living being,
I realize as a natural human being.

When I start your climb down,
Into the hear of the maddening town.
A town full of sorrows and troubles,
You give me will to break them like bubbles.

Oh Agasthya! You fill my entire view,
In all respect and devotion, I bow to you!!!

Born to Die?

2007-07-17T01:56:00.001-07:00

Enclosed within natural walls, in near darkness

Drifting within the womb, without direction

The unborn baby trains his eyes,

Ready to step out and face the light.

Half shut eyes, flicker at the warm rays,

The first feel of the outside world.

Colours emerge, figures take shape,

On a quest, to see more, know more.

Looking around, crying out loud,

It’s the sound of life, the voice within,

Announcing his arrival to the world,

The baby is initiated into a world of chaos.

The eyes strain to focus and perceive,

Only to be blinded by the hypocritic light

The ears open up for the experience of sound

Only to be deafened by mad shouts and shrill lies.

Twisting and turning, inside the cage of care,

Disturbed in senses, he gets the first taste of life

His mother’s womb, though dark, was secure,

Now, in open light, the baby feels lonely.

There was little he could do, to change,

It was his time to break out of natural captivity,

Walk out into the world, into freedom,

Walk on, with a free body, yet a captive spirit.

Festivities all around, celebrating his birth

Crowd of onlookers, looking at him in awe

Even though he is the cynosure of attention,

The baby feels himself pushed into a corner.

The prying eyes, the hollow smiles

Makes him confused, makes him wonder,

“Should I laugh? Should I cry?,

Wish I could laugh at their false faces!”

Burdened by worldly confusion and chaos,

The baby closes his eyes, on an effort to sleep,

Sleep on, to peace, sleep to shut himself off,

To forget the world, to live in his own dreams.

Born with no choice, he does not feel alive,

Hesitating, he looks back at his mother’s womb,

Shifting his gaze, to her loving eyes, he asks,

“Can you take me back into you, if I choose to return?”

The Shadow

2007-07-09T03:19:00.001-07:00

Light plays havoc, with me, my self

Laying out, my dark side, on the ground

The black alter-ego looms large with time

Before disappearing silently, into the dark night

The silent observer, the passive friend

Lurking around me, marking my presence

Cooling the earth with my caricature

He outlines my figure, with a virtual ink

Born of light, drawn off my lanky frame

The earth is a canvas, for the art in monotone

Seldom appreciated, the artist hides among clouds

Seldom noticed, the art sprawls over mother earth

Convulsing and changing, with the passing time

Sans expression, sans emotions, he exists

Reminds me of my life, on a topsy-turvy ride

In a world, sans expression, sans emotions

With each passing day, he is becoming more of me

Or am I becoming more of him?

I pray to the source, “Let there be no light”

Let me feel myself, let me be myself!!!

For Retaliation...

2007-05-21T22:24:00.000-07:00

Dullness all around, even the wind has a smirk,
Nothing but a graveyard, has been the place I work,
I killed my self and I bury myself each day
They still know not that they kill me every day!!!

Born on chance, lived on like a rock
Until now, when they take their chance to mock
Storm of rebukes, Oh! It weakens my soul
The lesser mortals, fulfill their petty role!!!

Purpose of life, the urge to live, seems to be lost,
Can’t take it, need to retrieve it at all cost
Isn’t it time yet for you, to stand up and fight back?
Asks my soul, don’t you see me getting a crack?

Confused, delirious, my mind wanders,
To unknown lands, my thought meanders,
Lonely and angry, my being pushes on
Is it for this plight, that me, the human, was born?

Enough of this, my soul rises to stand tall
No more of this, I am not going to fall
Time to open my eyes, face the world
The flag of retaliation, has finally been unfurled!

Dark Knight

2007-05-17T06:30:00.000-07:00

A small intro for the unfortunate readers, who get a chance to view my dark side. These 16 lines slashed down below, were penned down in 4 sets during a casual online conversation with my good friend, Sonu Sudhakaran. He wanted me to call it Black Poetry...but, the term is used for African American poetry. So, I am gonna give this one to be added to the annals of Dark Poetry!!! Let this one be splashed across the chaotic pages of dark poetry!!!

Life starts in wombs, in darkness
Grows up, in slow steps, with firmness,
Words of thought, in all grimness,
Makes me shout out loud, in all frankness!!!

The Devil comes out from the bowels of hell,
Night awakens with the ringing of the eternal bell,
Mere mortals, by my sword, along the way fell,
When I chose earth to be my place to dwell!!!

Knighted by the blinding light,
On a ghostly and dark night,
On a crusade to kill with might,
Giving none, a chance to fight!!!

Walking along the lines of fire,
At this moment, I vow, never to tire,
I will prepare my foe's funeral pyre
For this world is gonna be my mire!!!

Phoenix has risen from the ashes!!!

2007-05-16T02:41:00.000-07:00

The keys on my keyboard have not worn out!!! My fingers have not lost their sensory powers!!! My brain certainly has not succumbed to an eternal coma!!! So, then what was the reason for the absence? Interesting question! But, even I am searching for the answer. For me, I am a person who takes pride in my writing and believes that it makes complete. My thoughts are my best friends and my writings, my way of expressing myself. If I chose to put them aside for sometime, it should imply that I had forsaken myself for a while. The Phoenix did not die, it was murdered by the hypocritic society and the hollowness of human relations. Well, death is only for a moment. When the breath runs out and you feel life being drained from you, when the heart stops breathing and you become motionless, you are pronounced to be dead. But, the soul still lives. I believe in the eternal nature of the human soul.

Now, you might be wondering why I am speaking about the immortal soul? To speak about a mighty tree, it is important to speak about the soil, as the roots which hold the tree depend on it . Anyway, there is signifance to the statements that came earlier and it was a prelude to what I was about to deliver. In a death, the physical state dies and the spiritual state is liberated. For me, it has been a converse process for some time. The physical state was active, while the spiritual state was dead. It was a self induced coma, that kept me relaxed and in a dormant state. The time has come for the phoenix to rise from the ashes. Yes, I am back with my limitless deliverances of the innermost thoughts of my chaotic and confused mind.

WHEN THE WORLD BECOMES HELL, I NEED TO BE THE DEVIL TO TAKE CONTROL OF IT!!! HELL HAS OPENED ITS GATES!!! BEWARE MORTALS!!!!

A Pen for Chaos!!!

2007-02-21T22:11:00.000-08:00

Wandering expressions, sitting in a curve
Open ears, struggling to hear the voice
Stressed, confused, my pen goes on a journey
Without direction, on the white road of paper

The thin cylinder with colored fluid
Scribbling on, chaos in words
Thoughts wander off, somewhere
Where it is me, with myself

A world created from dreams
Reality? A strange term to me
Written words become friends
The pen becomes my accomplice

Is it a crime? Is it a mistake?
That I finally chose to be alone!!!

The face of the girl I love

2006-06-08T03:53:00.000-07:00

Time flies on like a galloping horse,
But,your face holds still with a force.
The moment I saw your face,I was lost,
In dreary thoughts,in fairy lands,in dreamy coasts.

Your eyes,like two precious gems,shone bright,
Like water droplets twinkling in misty morning light.
They spoke much more than your lips,
A small stare enough to cause heart slips.
Thoughts conveyed in a torrent through them,
Speech loses meaning in front of the gem.
I beg the eyelids;"Do not shut on those eyes!",
Denying me the sight of something so nice.

Your ears,the faithful listeners,adorn your face,
Hiding amidst your hair,when people gaze.
Serving you well,letting you know,
What people say,may it be friend or foe.
They peep out from amidst her hair,
When the wind claims,of your face,their share.
The two question marks on your pretty head,
Adds to your beauty,when your shyness makes it red.

Your nose,like a hanging fruit,reaches down,
Almost touching the lips, when you frown.
Seperating the eyes does it stand,
Like a faithful sentry on a stern command.
Turning to a bright red,when you are angry or shy,
Taking your beauty to an all new high.
Your smile makes it more cute,
The slender form making me mute.

Your lips,the epitome of beauty and charm,
The mere sight,makes a heart warm.
A blooming red rose do they remind,
The fullness of the lips strike my mind.
When you smile,they play their part,
The sensous look,captivating my heart.
It seems like they yearn for a kiss,
It is something I am not gonna miss.

Should God appear before me,granting me a wish,
No thoughts,the answer will be in one swish.
A girl I do love,ever so fine,
I ask you this,can she be mine???

What I want to be....

2006-03-26T10:14:00.000-08:00

Not to be a cat, with a domestic jingle,
But to be the king of the jungle!!!

Not to be a pigeon in a cage,
But to be the hawk, in a flight impossible to gauge!!!

Not to be a stagnant pond, still and silent,
But to be the ocean, raging and violent!!!

Not to be a stone, small and one in a lot,
But to be the mountain, making rains the wind brought!!!

Not to be a breeze, calm and mild,
But to be the storm, fast and wild!!!

Not to be a twig, frail and small,
But to be the tree, strong and tall!!!

Not to be a man, without any principles,
But to be the human, with many disciples!!!

To be that universal being, my heart feels!!!
To be with my Father, my soul kneels!!!

To that day, my eyes and mind look forward to,
To reach that goal, my body strives to do!!!!

My dream girl!!!

2006-01-14T14:18:00.000-08:00

As my fingers start moving on these keys on my dark keyboard, I am looking at a brighter aspect of life. A movie that I had just seen in television just worked as an inspiration into scripting this piece of literary rambling, but I am pretty sure this would make interesting reading as these words come right from the heart. There is that eternally romantic song playing in the background....There is the picture of the woman who captured my heart and occupied my dreams for the first time in my life...There is the yearning for being wanted by that single individual from the opposite sex, who would make you a complete man. Love is not in the air...but, I can certainly feel the breeze blowing past the strands of my hair and I know that it is indeed on it's way....I just need to realise it and hold on to it when it sweeps past me.
Before I start on the journey of discovering love through words written here, let me ask myself the all important question. What is love? Do I know what love is and will I be able to identify it when it happens to me? I need to be sure about it because if I am not, then what will follow in this literary piece will lose it's meaning. I have always seen love not just as an emotion. It is more than that. If you ask me, I would probably treat love as an extra sense...something other than the five basic senses. I know that you will laugh at my conclusion. But, what are our senses? They give us a perception about the world around us. Taste, Smell, Touch, Sight, Feel....so, in effect they help us in conducting ourselves as organized and better individuals. Now, how does love work as a sense? Have you ever observed a guy in love? He might be a guy not worried about his looks...not worried about time....not worried about his health. Once, he falls in love, he suddenly undergoes a complete metamorphosis. In most cases, I can confidently state that the rough guy becomes a well dressed and polished gentleman. It happens because the guy suddenly has a partner to impress and that makes him more conscious in whatever he does. Even though most guys do not admit it, it is natural law that an entity from one gender would try it's best to impress a partner from the opposite gender. We call it love. Nature gives it a better name...Protection of the species, because it eventually leads to offsprings and ensures that the species is saved from extinction.
I have always tried to visualise the girl of my dreams. I know that the woman who occupied my heart during my college days is never going to fade away from memory. First love and first kiss always remains in your mind. When I talked to a person who became a close friend within a very short span of time, I was forced to think about my life and the significance of love in my life. I have always wondered what it would feel like to wake up everyday from bed at the crack of dawn and visualise that beautiful face even before my eyes opened up into the realms of reality around me. The sight of her face within my mind and behind my closed eyes, will be a promise of good luck and a hope of a great day. When I open my eyes, my first thought would be to grab her photo so perfectly captured and so elegantly framed, and give it a kiss, assuring myself that I am going to see her again. What a great start for a day. I will not feel lazy or tired in doing my morning chores because the main target for the day was to see her again and talk to her. I spend more time in front of the mirror chosing my dress, arranging my hair and giving finishing touches to my whole attire. Obviously, my dress would be the type and colour that she prefers. I do not want to come a cropper before her at the start of a wonderful day.
As I step within the four walls of my destination, I could visualise her standing inside, waiting for me to come in. The anxious eyes and the nervous cracking of her fingers, expecting my arrival would assure me that here is a person who is really eager to see me. When I walk in, I can see her eyes growing wide and that closed lips opening up , into a beautiful smile. I can read her joy in finally having set eyes upon me. But, the professional within her forbades her from an excessive display of emotions. I can see her fidgetting in her position, trying hard not to make it obvious. The eyes which were looking out into the corridors and the ears which were strained to catch the sound of my footsteps, were suddenly diverted into work. I understood that it was a ploy to convince me that my entrance did not cause any difference in her demaneour. As I sign the attendance register, I can see the disturbed body language and the sideways glances. I knew that I just had to spread my arms and she would come running to me.
When she walks past me, I forget to admire her looks or physical appearance. None of the usual comments that comes from a guy's mouth on seeing a beautiful girl, is delivered here. I just stand still, my eyes closed and inhale her feminine aroma. I know that her fragrance will be etched in my senses and I will be able to recognise it from a distance. As she walks past me, she is careful not to look at me and smile. I know that she does that purposefully, to playfully irritate me. As my anger boils over, and she has gona quite a distance from me, she looks back and gives me that charming smile. At that moment, all the anger that I had carefully constructed, shatters into pieces. Anger loses it's meaning in front of her and I am transformed into a kitten from the roaring lion that I was moments ago. Women are indeed powerful and quite capable in harnessing a guy's feelings. As I work, she comes and stands behind my chair. I don't even have to look back to know that she is there. Her presence suddenly elevates the performance levels of my senses and I am more alert than ever. She carefully watches me work without uttering a word. Meanwhile, my mind yearns for a touch and I pray to God for her fingers to brush my shoulders. Fortunately, God was awake and grants me my wish. As her fingers accidentally brushed against my body, my whole body shuddered and it made her also conscious and she suddenly walked away. I cursed for the sensitive response from my body to the physical touch that I most yearned for. But, even as she walked away, she once again gave me that sensous smile. Smile ceases being a physical expression and becomes a poem on her face, laced with the charm of her feminine beauty.
Suddenly, it is afternoon and time for lunch. When we sit for having our food, she makes it a point to sit across me. As I try hard to concentrate on my food, I can see her dark eyeballs following my each move. Even as I stretch to reach for the glass of water, she shows an unnecessary hurry in passing it to me. When I take the glass from her hand, my fingers accidentally brushes against her fingers and I could sense her body shudder this time. People sitting around was having a whale of a time joking about us, but we were totally oblivious to their comments. We were lost in a world of our own and we were communicating through our eyes. Even as she finished her lunch and was about to move out, I was coming in for another glass of water. We almost bumped into each other and I could see her cheeks turning bright red as I held her to prevent her from falling. Her hand felt cold and it felt like she did not want to get up. Yet again, she awarded me with that million dollar smile.
Before we knew it, it was evening. We moved out of office and went straight to the beach. When we sat on the beach, with her head on my chest and both of us looking out into the sea, I knew this was the life I had yearned for. The setting sun had made the sky a colourful canvas and there was a myriad of colours strewn over the horizon. Sunset signifies the end of the day, but for us, it provided the perfect setting to hold onto each other more strongly. With her head on my shoulders, I felt more responsible and realised that she made me complete. WIth her hand inside my hand and my cheek resting on her head, I realised that this was the most beautiful moment of the day. It was slowly getting dark, but we were not really noticing it. We were seeing the ocean with it's powerful waves and feeling the love we had for each other.I knew then that I do not have to be someone else with this wonderful woman. She accepted me as I am and what more can I expect from my partner. I realised that it was no longer me and her...but US!!!
Coming back to the real world, I know that it is all a dream. But, I presume everybody needs to dream. Dreams have transformed nations and individuals. The power to dream is awesome. Hence, I too will dream of that woman, who will accept me with all my negative points and appreciate the positives within me... who will stand beside me in times of distress and offer me her lap to rest my head when I am tensed...who will run her fingers through my hair and kiss my forehead making me relaxed and happy....who will listen to my worries and will help me get over them all....who will always give me a smiling face and make me smile too. The day such a girl walks into my life will be my judgement day...but, this judgement day will be for the good and definitely for life!!!!
Let me sign off with the lyrics of the song which I was hearing when I started writing this anecdote

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing

Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you're far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure
I don't wanna close my eyesI don't wanna fall asleep
Cause I'd miss you, babyAnd I don't wanna miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of youThe sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babyAnd I don't wanna miss a thing

I LOVE YOU MY DREAM GIRL!!!

The idea of flight!!!

2005-11-09T00:09:00.000-08:00

I looked up at the clear sky. There were not too many white clumps of vapour or better still, as it is normally called, clouds. The day was sunny and pleasant. Suddenly, I saw an eagle hovering high above. Outlined against the vast expanse of the sky, it looked small and insignificant. But, the sight of the black outline of the bird with the stretched wings, projected a more significant meaning than just a bird in flight. For me, the sight suddenly portrayed freedom!!!

The sight had a lasting impression and made me think about the relation between freedom and flight. Being a born thinker, it was not long before my brain was smoking with thoughts, complicated ones at that. For a start, I remembered that right from the time I started reading and understanding English, I have heard a particular statement which explains freedom aptly.
"He/She is a free bird". It is strange that the concept of freedom linked to a human being who is a social "animal" as we say, is connected to a totally different class of living things. A bird in flight for us, signifies freedom than anything else. The mere concept of flying or floating in space gives the impression of independence, liberation and anything associated with freedom. On the other hand, we tend to give the statement, "He/She is a caged animal" to signify the lack of freedom. Maybe the lack of freedom makes you equivalent to an animal, very much connected to the ground and feeling the surface, while freedom makes you equivalent to a bird, without any physical connection to any surface and just floating along the air.

Moreover, from a literary perspective, flight got a very strong bond with human emotions and character. Writers generally tend to write expressions like "His dreams fly high". So, flight is linked to our thoughts, dreams and imagination. Emotions may run high, but imagination always flies. Have you ever noticed very young kids, who have not really started reasoning things out? They generally tend to throw things and are quite amused by the object rising high in the air. Try throwing the kid up in the air and majority of them would absolutely love it, than being cradled in the arm. I think that is also the reason why kids are so amused by aeroplanes. They can feel or touch other objects as they are on ground and give a better sensory understanding. But, aeroplanes and birds which fly high, are beyond their sensory range and they feel awed by the sight. So, obviously the idea of flight is naturally amusing to human beings.

Moreover, I believe human beings became the most superior race in the world, because of their natural curiosity for the unknown. The curiousity level of the humans must have got to a saturation point, about how the birds flew, when they finally decided to try out the idea. The numerous accidents, some of which were fatal, did not diminish their efforts. The ability to fly was finally available for human beings. But, I believe that the root of all this was the sheer wish to feel free and complete. If you ask a group of people about their sense of freedom, I can easily see many of them choosing flying as an example. So, flight in general epitomized freedom.

I ride on the wings of freedom.......

Smile....huh!!!

2005-09-22T03:24:00.000-07:00

Smile....an interesting topic to write on. I am a keen observer of people. I do not necessarily analyze them, but I do note their facial expressions. Even at a very young age, I had this habit of putting myself in the place of the listener, when I was talking to someone. It was more like trying to watch myself talk. I used to analyze my body language and my facial expressions. Our face is actually like a transparent surface. Very few people can hide the actual emotions, underlying beneath the flesh and blood and deep inside your mind. You may hold back your tears, you may force a smile and you may try to look cheerful. But, I can assure you that 9 times out of 10, your eyes will betray you. But, the basic question is simple and straight! Why do you have to put on a show, when you can be just yourself and be true to your personality? I know that it would be very hard for me to smile when I am angry and in the same way, it would be very hard for me to enjoy a joke, when I am sad. Today, I saw someone smile at me. I have this very bad habit of making friends with everyone pretty soon. This particular individual impressed me fast, attitude-wise. I won't say I got attached a lot, but I definitely saw that person as a good friend. Well, change is inevitable I suppose or maybe the change was also a forced one due to many other factors. I am confused as I said before. Anyway, when I saw that person smile, I felt kinda sad because it looked more like a forced smile. A smile is believed to accentuate a person's beauty. It has to come from within. It should not be just a physical change in your face, but a mental change, with your mind swelling up with happiness and peace. Only then, will it become a smile...until, then it would be more of a smirk. I know that I cannot smile when I am hurt...I know that I cannot smile when I am angry...but, I know that I can make others smile when I am happy...because my happiness would reflect in my smile. Maybe the person who smiled at me today, did not find me worth being considering as a friend. I am hurt as usual. But, people change and world changes....I still stick to the principles that I believed. It is easier to just change your swimming style according to the flow and just drift... I guess the real challenge is to stick to the swimming style that you are master of and that you believe in and then swim against the flow to reach the destination. All those who smirk at me now, will then regret the chance lost to make a good friend. I am sure of that. Until then, smile on... but,the world has not lost all it's good!!!

I believe in myself now!!!!

Peace,
Arun

The first page of my diary!!!!

2005-09-22T02:34:00.000-07:00

Hi there....Namaste...Good afternoon!!! Today, I decided to start writing and express myself freely through you. You are more than just a huge and heavy book for me. You are gonna be my best friend and the keeper of my conscience. From now on, noone else will know what happens inside this complicated head of mine. You are gonna be a part of me. So, as a first step, I should try not to see you as a book. A book is immediately associated wiht an inanimate and static thing. But, I want you to be dynamic and share your feelings with me too, just as I do with you. Any friendship should be a two-way system, where the traffic is not obstructed by any stop lights. Inhibitions, formalities and insecurities destroy the spirit of friendship. So, I am gonna try and see you as a living entity...as a human being. So, where do I start? I should first give you a name. A man without identity is like a balloon without air. Only when the air is filled will it acquire the ability to fly high. Similarly, a man is recognised by his name and that is what differentiates him from other fellow human beings. Yes, I do have a great name for you. When I see you as my closest friend, the best name for you would be "BUDDY". By the power vested in me, as your owner ( After all, I paid for your ownership), I christen you, Five in one notebook, "BUDDY"...B...U...D...D...Y!!! Welcome to my world of problems, confusions, tensions and whatever negative is possible for a human being. I can assure you that it is not gonna be an easy ride together. So, do hold on tight!!!!

Goodbye Cruel World!!!

2005-08-23T13:33:00.000-07:00

Suicide as a word, means "The act or an instance of intentionally killing oneself." Death is a natural process and no human being can escape from it's grip. That is why we are called Mortals. But, when a person kills himself intensionally, we call that death by the unique name of "Suicide". Most suicides would have a suicide note associated with it. It is more like a parting statement from the individual, who wants the world to know why he did it. I too had such an instance in my life when I no longer wanted to live and I too had written a suicide note. There is an interesting website(http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/), which describes the reason for suicide. I was really impressed with their explanation and I feel any person who feels desperate and lonely in life and contemplating suicide should go through this site.

"Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain."

This is my suicide note:

"Life is a journey and now after each step I take, I look back and regret the place where I took the wrong turn. My life had been smooth and easy until then. How things changed with just that one wrong step. One step led to another and before I knew it, I had come a long way to even think about returning to the point of diversion, Now, all I see is darkness and evil around me. It used to be so pleasant and gratifying. At this point, I do feel that there is no point in living. After all, none of us are gonna live forever. If things could get better for a lot of others due to my absence, so be it!!!"

You know what is interesting...I still carry this note in my purse!!!

Love,
AK

CET...not just three letters

2005-08-15T15:13:00.000-07:00

"Wake up,Son!",my mom was pulling the sheets that covered my body,protecting me from the morning chill.It was Monday and on account of the deep and peaceful sleep I had the previous night,I had somehow forgotten the enormity of the occasion.I was to be inducted into the CET community that day…a dream for a majority of plus2 students.This sounded more like a fairy tale beginning…didn’t it?.For a moment,the creative writer within me took over.But,today,I don’t want you to read my article….I want you to hear me talk to you.Written communication assumes great importance when it is presented in an oratory manner.I believe in that.People prefer listening to a person who speaks eloquently,displaying his emotions,than hear a person blankly reading out something.So,I will be trying to speak to each one of you,from this moment,in this article.

CET….the three letters which holds supreme importance in my life.It is really tough to actually convey the true feeling of having been a CETian. Even if I tried to do so,I wouldn’t be doing full justice to the effort and to the institution.It is indeed a feeling that has to be experienced.So,I will try to tell you what I have experienced in my 5 years of CET life. For an additional info…due to some personal reasons,I had to drop a year and study with my juniors…which explains the 5 years.But,I definitely don’t regret it…I actually see it in a positive way because I got a bit more time to know the college and to familiarize with a lot more people.I actually wanted to tell you 5 main things through this article.But,before that,I want you to hold my hand so that we can take a trip down memory lane together and experience CET the way it was in 1999.

When I got down from the city bus, before the college entrance, I could simply stare at amazement at the sight that met my eyes.I had to actually hold my father’s hands to get a grip on my senses.Here I was,standing on the pedestal of one of the premier institutions in the state,about to become a part of it and the thought itself made me nervous.New campus, new classmates, new books, new clothes….everything was new and refreshing. I am purposefully not going into the details of the admission process,simply because it doesn’t have much of a value as far as this article goes.I was shown my classroom and I settled down to start my life as a CETian.Just keep in mind that this article is not like one of those dragging family dramas that you find in a television set. Keeping aloof from too much of a detailed rendering,I will be concentrating on the finer and exciting moments of my life at CET.
Anwyay,all was not well with my life at CET,as I had hoped.Just as we were beginning to enjoy college life,there entered a terrifying group of guys,we called seniors,with their favourite hobby,ragging.I know that the freshers these days may find it hard to believe,but trust me guys when I say that it was total hell for the first two or three months.I was instructed to look down into the ground while walking,for the first two weeks,while I was inside the campus.There were numerous other instances too,which I secretly enjoyed. It was then that I relaised that there were certain names inside the campus,the bearers of which were not mere individuals,but legends by themselves.It was more like listening to the exploits of a historic figure,that I listened with awe about the daring things these guys have done.Their legend indeed preceded them.I don’t know how many of you guys have heard about the names Valve tube,Pathiri,Mattom,Bond etc.I fortunately got the good fortune to become friendly with all these so called legends.It sometimes pays to be modest and humble before seniors.When you give respect,you get respect automatically.I can guarantee you ,that going by my experience.I too had a wish that when I left college,my juniors know me by my nickname.

I have experienced almost every aspect of life from CET.When I say every aspect,I am mentioning about both the good and bad aspects of life.Remember one thing Guys….life is never gonna be a bed of roses.Each and everyone of you is gonna be thrown head-first violently,into the unforgiving and tumultuous circle of life.It is better to be prepared right from your college days,than to find the going tough later.Working in an MNC myself,I know what life is gonna throw at you.Right from my school days,I used to believe in a one-liner.It was kind of a motto for me.It went,"Live for the moment!!!".Live your life to the fullest because you never know what tomorrow may hold for you.Now,let’s get on to the issues I wanted to talk to you about.

Right from the time I joined CET,I have been reminded of the CET spirit by my seniors.Let me tell you a specific incident.I went to attend Hotch Potch,one week after joining CET.There,I saw my super seniors cheering on our college.I was reluctant to join them,as I was a junior and some of them had even ragged me on my first week of CET life.Then,accidentally,one guy came upto me and asked me which college I was representing.When I answered CET,he asked me why I was standing aloof and told me to join the CET gang immediately.One of the guys in the group was none other than Arun Kumar.G,who had been our Arts Club Secretary and whom most guys fondly know as "Swamy".It was then that I realized that beyond the boundaries of the campus,the lines drawn between seniors and juniors were gone and that everyone was united under a much more stronger banner,CETians.I was always amazed to see the way Leander Paes and Mahesh Bhuapthi bumped their chests during their matches.It displayed a lot of intensity and spirit…the spirit of being an Indian.I wouldn’t say that you should start bumping your chests when you see another CETian…but,you should definitely imbibe the spirit of being a CETian.Be proud of it and stand up for it.Never be afraid or shy to state before anyone that you are a CETian.Even when I say these words,the passion builds up within me.I am proud of being a CETian.Remember one of our cheering lines.."Sabse aage ladke kaun???....CET,CET!!!"

Attitude plays an important part in an individual’s life.It acquires greater significance when you enter into a responsible job.Sadly,I have been noting that the charismatic attitude and magnetic personality,once a hallmark of a CETian,is slowly becoming a thing of the past.It is indeed shocking to know that many guys view CET just as a platform to push forward their careers.I know that it sure helps in that aspect with campus interviews and all.But,CET is to be viewed as a much more stronger foundation….a foundation for moulding your character.It is high time you understood that education is not just about getting a highly paid job.When you study in an institution,particularly one like CET,education as a term should have a broader meaning.Through education,you should be able to develop your character,recognize your talents,realize your energy and make a better individual out of yourself.So,when you join CET,your thoughts should definitely not be just about CGPU and your dream company or maybe even CAT or GATE.They are all important in their own way,but those are definitely not the only things that should count in your college life.Life just has a forward button.At no point of time,can you press a rewind button.Youth comes only once.The main advantage of being young is that you are full of energy and full of ideas.You don’t have to harness your thoughts and actions,simply because you don’t have too many responsibilities.Use your energy for creative purposes.I never regretted cutting a class or two to have a snack with my friends;I won’t regret working in the political campaign during college elections and delivering speeches in classes;I definitely don’t regret working in the organizing committee of four Dhwanis.These things have helped me in a variety of ways.Experiences count a lot in your life and I am where I am because of whatever I have experienced during my college life.You can easily live through each day monotonously following the same routine.It would be like watching a black and white movie.Friends,why don’t you add some colour to it?.Try to get involved in all college activites and make it a point to even cast your vote during college elections.Being a part of college activities boost up your resume in a big way..believe me!!!Refraining from being part of all these things may give you a comfortable nap in your bed till noon,but it is robbing you of a lot of other things.It robs you of an opportunity to work in a team;It robs you of an opportunity to express your ideas;It robs you of an opportunity to meet new people;It robs you of an opportunity to exercise your right!!!These experiences help a lot when you set foot on a professional job environment.I see my seniors at the company repenting about having wasted their college days ,buried in their books and not participating in anything.Remember that these are guys earning 5 digit salaries in a top MNC,leading settled married lives.They want to be young again.What I want to tell you is that..don’t ever put yourself in their predicament!!!

Now,let’s speak about a sensitive part of your college life.I am speaking about relations.These days,people are so busy that they don’t even have time for ten minutes of friendly chat.Let me list some names here first.Anupama Sundar,Asha.P.George,Shreejit Nair,Ajay Prasad,Anu Ann,Manoj R.,Deepa Padmanabhan,Betty and the list continues.Now,these may appear as just names for you.But,when I look at them,I see them as integral parts of my life.Each one of them have stood by me,one time or the other,when I needed them.Make some really good friends while you are in college.You are not going to make too many close friends in a corporate setup anyway.Be very open in your friendship and don’t let ego come in the way of a good relation.I have seen so many good friendships broken because of that one factor.You have to be true to yourself first and then true to the other person,in every relation.Moreover,I see a lot of love affairs happening during college life.Loving a girl or boy is easy,but maintaining the commitment and assuming responsibility is difficult.So,don’t just have an affair because you see it as a privilege to boast before your friends that you have a boyfriend or girlfriend.Put a lot of thought before committing yourself.Love is not a game.You can’t call a time-out or retire in the middle of it!!!I had suffered by not being able to convince myself that I loved a girl in our college.So,from personal experience,I want to tell you to be truthful to yourself!!!

It is indeed sad to note that most people don’t bother to keep in touch once they leave college.They write colourful promises in autographs about how they will be there for each other and even promise in person at times.Unfortunately,as it is said,promises are meant to be broken it seems.Other than some close friends,no one really bothers to keep in touch.During the days immediately after leaving college,an e-group is created and everyone makes solid promises about mailing regularly.I tell you that in two years time,you will get a notice from yahoo saying that they are closing the group due to inactivity.I want to advise you not to be like that.Come up with some real good plans to keep in touch.Make sure that you bring out an address book with everyone’s photos.Inform each and everyone a change in address,when it happens.Try to organize occasional meetings.Hey…you never forget a doctor who attended to your wound for 10 minutes and reduced your pain.Then,how can you forget your classmate who was there beside you for 4 long years,sharing your happiness and sadness???.Just think about it!!!

The last and the most important thing of all is remembering your alma-mater.The institution which made you what you are.It gave you an identity of your own.I have seen lots of guys stating that they are CETians with a lot of pride…even with a bit of arrogance.So,CET definitely has a value.You owe a lot to the institution and the faculty.We may have had bitter experiences with teachers,but still they are what they are and they reached that position because they deserved to.Even when you try to blame a teacher’s shortcomings,have you ever thought about stopping into his or her shoes???I can assure you that it is one of the most challenging tasks in the world,when it comes to handling a class.I have experienced that first-hand.So,do give due respect to your teachers,even while maintaining your individuality.Tomorrow,when you get a job and venture out into the treacherous and thankless world of responsibilities,I would like you to find some time and think seriously about doing something for our second mother,our college.My batch is already thinking of instituting something like a scholarship for a student.Do start thinking about something now itself,so that when you move out of college,you will be sure of what to do.Remember ,the college and faculty were there for you when you were a student…so,it is your moral responsibility to be there for them as an alumna.

Hey…I have to get ready to go to the company now.Work calls!!! Hope you will give serious thought to whatever I have told you as a senior,as a friend,as a brother…more importantly,as a past CETian.By the way,I did succeed in getting myself known by my nickname.CETians don’t know me as ARUN.K……they better know me as "KARU"!!!!

Love & Peace,
AK

Black???...Enough!!!

2005-08-15T14:43:00.000-07:00

Black was just a colour to me until I started realising the world around me. Not everything around me was fair, in the literary sense and in the philosophical sense. The tag of a black kid was set on me at a very young age. I still remember going to my mother after school and asking her why i was born so dark. The kids at school never really understood that it hurt me badly to be mocked at for my natural body colour tone. I used to be really aggressive about it, but it is easier to close a crack in a dam and than to shut the mouth of a person. Well, i felt that things would improve when the kids grow upto be teenagers and when they become mature. But, alas even today, while working in an MNC, the stigma of being a dark guy, follows me. To be honest, I really don't like being made fun of for my colour.

Black is associated with power, elegance, formality, death, evil, and mystery. This is the basic implication of black as a colour. But, am i really black? All these people who enjoy calling me black, i don't think that i am really black. I am dark, but i am not black. Indians are basically chocolate brown in colour. That is the colour of the mud and in a way, I am proud to be born of that colour. I am closer to Mother earth than any of you!!! I was born in a poor family and my father was a person who came up in life through hard work and determination. When I was young, he used to tell me tales of how the landlord saw my father and his family with contempt and how they had to move out of the way when the so called fair guys came by. History calls it untouchability...I call it atrocious. Having grown hearing all the hardships my father had to endure because he was born in a poor family and becuase he was dark, i hated anyone who found too much pleasure in making fun of my body colour. Fun should never be at the expense of hurting another person's sentiments. At that point, you cross the line of fun and enter the dark area of insult.

Back in America, making fun on the basis of colour was called Racism. What do you call it now? I think it could be associated to some fun time in an office. It is strange and pathetic that people really find pleasure in making fun of some individual's physical shortcomings. I don't understand why people don't go around making fun of physically handicapped people or mentally ill people. They view them sympathy and try to support them. I don't need anyone's sympathy nor do I need anyone's support. I have always been a loner in my life and have always suffered at the hands of my friends. But, could you please refrain from hurting me again and again? Each time you make fun of me for the colour i was born in, I look upto God and ask him, why me of all people??? Can't you see it my friends??? Each of your rebukes are like nails thrust into my flesh. I am sure you will not understand. But, some things have to be experienced and not just seen. When i write my life's story in this blog, you will understand why I am getting hurt. Until then, you can really go on hurting me...calling me black!!!

Again, when I think of it, if you are really being happy calling me black, you could as well continue with it. I believe that if I could make a person smile and know that he is happy, then that is the best feeling in this world. So, go ahead and have fun at my expense. I just want you all to know that i am black because I was born to my father!!!

Don't think I can't answer back
Words aplenty in my mouth, I do pack
But, each time, you call me black
I feel, it is culture, that you lack!!!

Love & Peace,
AK

Criticise...You have to say something,right???

2005-08-15T13:31:00.000-07:00

Criticism is a word writers appreciate and hate at the same time. Most of the time, most people tend to take it as a license to insult and rebuke other people through their work. They fondly call it criticism. But, what is criticism as far as literary works are concerned? Criticism can be defined as the practice of analyzing, classifying, interpreting, or evaluating literary or other artistic works. The three words analyzing, classifying and interpreting are very important here. I feel them as important because the so-called critics casually tends to forget the first two. Their criticism has got to do more with the interpretation of the work, without any sort of analysis or classification. Mostly, criticism happens because people feel that they will be belittled if they don't something about a piece of work. It has got more to do with making his or her presence felt in the crowd than with any real understanding of the work.

Now comes the most interesting angle to criticism. I understand the idea behind criticising something which is a modified entity. It could be a literary work or anything else which had it's inspiration or original idea from something else. It is fine because in such a case, we have the presence of a standard with which we could compare the work under criticism. But, how or more importantly why do you have to criticise something original? There is more than one reason for me to ask this question. I am pretty sure you will understand the relevance of the question through this article.

An individual writes something from his mind. I am a person who forcefully stopped reading any book, four years ago. Many of my friends felt that as a weird and foolish move. But, I had my reasons. I felt that the more you read something, you start beginning to have favourite works and authors and in all probability, your works will get influenced by that writer. I am a person who likes to maintain a writing style of my own. A style which is unique and fresh and not compared to anyone elses'. This is my personal view point and subject to argument. On a lighter note, when I wrote " subject to argument", I suddenly remembered something. We live in a society where people argue or make comment, simply because they don't want to be left out. I feel that strange and funny!!! Anyway, not to deviate from the main topic, original writing is beyond negative criticism I think Criticism is fine...but negative criticism on an original work is not good.

I think I can explain my point more clearly with a practical approach. A small kid draws something or scribbles down something. He or she brings it to you for your comment. What do you do? Do you analyze it from all angles and study the logic and perfection behind that creation? I don' t think you will ever do that. You simply stroke the head of the budding artist and speak words of encouragement. I know that you will argue that you did that so as not to hurt the young mind. But, still you appreciated the work, no matter how simple and vague it was. The originality and the creative effort taken by the kid made you appreciate him or her. Now, why does the attitude change with grown up artists? I guess the situation remains the same...only the age changes. Still you like to say something more on the negative front than on the positive side. I feel it has got more to do with the failure to understand the mindset of the writer.

When a normal man reads Shakespeare's work, he may find it as absurd and rubbish. It is simply because of his inability to decipher the inner meaning and the literary prowess in Shakespeare's works. Similarly, history would prove that almost all inventors were mocked at, during the initial phases of their inventions. It is only time that has brought the importance of their inventions into the limelight. So, I am forced to believe most people today, simply do not have the mindset to appreciate any creative work. There could be two reasons for that. One could be because they do not have the intellectual development to understand the essence of the work or because of the fact that they are jealous of the creator's capabilities. Creative work, whether it be literary or any other work, can only be appreciated, simply because it cannot be compared to anything else, as it is original!!!

Gotta say something, so criticise
Need to show others, you are wise
Among others, you have to rise
But think, isn't it good to be just nice?

Love & Peace,
AK

Write away...

2005-08-15T12:40:00.000-07:00

Why do I write???
An interesting question!!! On the outset, it seems strange and outright absurd. But, when I think about it from a mental plane different from normal human beings, I feel that there is more than a single reason or circumstance for writing anything. By now, you must be having a vague idea about the complex and out of the normal world thoughts that pop up inside this weird head of mine. So, please don't expect this to be a normal study about the various aspects that leads to a written document. This is more of a writer's perspective than of a researcher's perspective.

Let's lay down the various circumstances in a methodical manner

1) Writing under compulsion

This is a strange way to write something. I see writing as a form of expression of one's thoughts. Anything written out of compulsion is devoid of life and imagination. It remains a stale piece of literary work. One good example of writing under compulsion could be the study aid we call homework. I feel that 80% of students see homework as a burden than as a method to improve their academic prowess. The moment a student feels that way, the basic purpose of enhancing the knowledge of students by giving the homework, is lost. He or She will be doing the homework as a way to escape being flogged by the teacher. I think the term "Homework" itself is inappropriate. Home is a place where we reach each day evening to relax, after the hard day's toiling. As per the dictionary, work is a physical or mental effort or activity directed toward the production or accomplishment of something. So, when you think about doing work at home, that itself brings in an element of mental stress. So, I guess the mere thought of homework or compelled writing is stressful and unnecessary.

2) Writing out of necessity

Writing out of necessity is less stressful. This kind of writing is more objective oriented. There is a definite goal associated with this writing genre. One very good example is an examination. An examination is not a compulsive routine. The candidate has the choice to attend it or flunk it. But, there is a definite purpose to writing an exam. Generally, there will be a definite achievement that materialise as the result of an examination. It could be a recognition or promotion. The chances of someone flunking an examination are very less, as it provides him with a recognition which will help him in his academic or professional career. However, this kind of writing lacks the creative element in it. An examination can be successfully tackled by studying the prescribed books and the proper application of the knowledge you have acquired from those books. It has got more to do with intellectual prowess than with the creative imagination.

3) Writing as a way of expression

Writing can be a form of expression too. It could substitute your tongue and the writing medium could be your friend. This is the form of writing we associate to great poets and thinkers and writers. No literary genius writes because he was forced to write or he had to write. It is more or less a natural process, wherein the thoughts get transformed into letters on paper. Again, it is not necessary that the writing has to be logical or perfect. The moment you compare a writer's work with another writer's work, the very essence of originality is lost. I will be writing more about that aspect in another post. So, each writer is unique and comparing his work to any other person's work is not right. You never compare one flower to another, because each one is beautiful in it's own aspect. I feel writing skill is a gift to any human being. I don't claim to be a great writer, but I know I can communicate my thoughts better with a pen than with my tongue. I guess that is what marks a writer from a normal man. Learn to acknowledge a writer even if you cannot respect or appreciate him.

My thoughts, my dreams, I do write
Morning to noon, till late night
I am not sure whether it is all right
But, it fills my heart with light!!!

Love & Peace
AK

A Love Story

2005-08-01T23:34:00.000-07:00

Love is a wonderful feeling. Having been bogged down by a lot of negative incidents in my life, I grew up as a person craving for love. This poem was a lyrical representation of a fantasy, where I became the one who was left stranded in this vast ocean of complex emotions. Love for me was simply Lost Over Valiant Efforts!!!

A LOVE STORY

Here, I tell a story
Which shines with its glory
A story true to the last word
A story which is not absurd
I once loved a young girl
Who, to me, was as precious as a pearl
I thought about her morning and afternoon
I spent sleepless nights looking at the moon
Yet I did not have the courage to tell her
Of the love I had for her
I waited for her patiently, each day
And she passed me like an electric ray
Sending shocks of ecstasy through my heart
She walked away gracefully like a hart
Finally I got my chance
When she went for a dance
I found her alone in a seat
And my heart missed a beat
Though filled with tension of the moment
I waited tirelessly for a vent
To tell her my mind
Towards which she might be kind
To understand me
And to know my agony
I finally poured out
My feelings, standing stout
On which she looked surprised
And I myself relieved
That I had finally told her my situation
Without any sort of hesitation
There began our love story
About which, I now worry
For friends, I am telling this story with a sigh
That I finally bid her good-bye
She left me standing love-sick
Seeing which I was dumb-struck
Friends, here I tell a story
Which shines with its glory
A story true to the last word
A story which is not absurd
A young girl, I once loved
By whom, I was finally ditched.

Who Am I???

2005-08-01T23:05:00.000-07:00

Who am I?A day in 1981,I peeped out into this green planet,my home,earth,after having spent ten months in my mother’s womb.Am I a baby kangaroo that she had been carrying me around in a pouch?After my birth,there was an endless flow of visitors to see me.Am I the Kohinoor diamond that I am displayed for all to see?All those who came to see me,either pinched me or did something else,just to see me cry.Am I a newly launched product in the market that they are testing to see whether it is working or not?Whenever I used to cry,my mother used to give me milk,to keep me quiet.Am I an old machine that is given oil when it creaks?As I joined school,I was made to carry a huge and heavy bag on my poor back,with lots of books.Am I a domesticated donkey,that they expect me to carry the entire load without complaining even once?In school,the “know-all” teacher used to shoot an array of questions at me.Am I a supercomputer,that she expects and answer to every question she asks?When I failed to answer the questions,she gave impositions by the order of 1000’s.Am I a photocopying machine that she expects me to make endless copies of the same thing without tiring?

Throughout my school days,I have been tossed about by my friends,seniors and teachers.Am I the ball in a pinball game that I am being tossed about without any real reason?Even when I returned from school,my mom used to yell at me to do my homework.Am I a mechanical clock that is expected to run the whole day?With passing years and adequate supply of food,I grew up.Am I a plant that grows heavenwards on getting the required nutrition?Then,I joined college and fell in love with a girl who controlled my senses.Am I a remote controlled toy that she decided what I should do and what I should not?I finally married that girl,simply because marriage is a very important aspect of Indian culture.Am I one side,say ‘heads’ of a coin,that it needs the ‘tails’ side to complete it’s form?I got a job and the boss made it a point to vent his frustrations on me everyday,by calling me all sorts of names.Am I a wastepaper basket that he was throwing anything that he felt like into it?Even when I returned home,my wife used to give me a long list of things to buy.Am I a genie who came out of the lamp that I could satisfy any wish of her’s?I had kids and I started growing old with changing hair colour and skin texture.Am I a green leaf that changes colour and becomes brittle as years passby?Once I got old,I was ridiculed and abused by many,including my family.Am I the aged watchdog,which is abused,once it has lost the ability to guard the house?Finally,when I died,I was put in a coffin and buried six feet under the ground.Am I a rotten piece of food material,that is covered up and buried to avoid the foul smell?Even when I continued my journey into the nether world,the question still remained.Who was I really?Was I a human being only?

Well,life in it’s entire span,is nothing but a journey into finding out the answer to the question,”Who am I?”.Once that answer is found,there is nothing left to find,because then you will have joined an elite group of stalwarts like Buddha.Yes,knowing who you are is what is called getting enlightenment.It is the ultimate purpose of a person’s birth.Life is not a destination,but a journey.You reach that destination,when you get the answer to that one question,”Who am I?”

The day my HDD passed away...

2005-08-01T10:34:00.000-07:00

Black was the colour for the day.It was the 30th of June.In a symbolic way...just like the month of June had ended,so did this reporter's HDD breathe it's last.In a rather dramatic nay extremely tragic turn of events,my HDD head spinned it's last spin before saying goodbye to the processor and to this world. It all started 7 months ago,when the SAMSUNG SP0802N 80GB hard disk was brought into it's new home....my computer.I had decided to purchase it to increase my storage space inorder to supplement my increasing daily downloads list.The HDD was only in it's infant stage and was very lively.There was a spring in it's operating speed and I was essentially happy that it had adjusted well to it's new home.You can probably call our own "WATZ THERE" Manoj as the Godfather of the HDD,as he had worked as the middle man in adopting the HDD from the manufacturing orphanage. Anyway,within weeks of it's arrival,the HDD was taught the ways of my internet life.Downloads started to pile in and movies copied from other HDDs were stacked,taking space along with them.But,physical interaction or connection with other HDDs resulted in my poor HDD contracting HTHTD or Hard Disk To Hard Disk Transmitted Diseases.With movies and music came viruses,worms,trojans and spyware.My HDD was beginning to show first sign of weakness.I tried to boost it's immune system by giving it Norton Antivirus tablets and Zone Alarm Firewall injections.With 24 hour net connection adn my HDD's failing immune system,my computer became an open gateway for undesirable elements. By the last week of June,things were at a breaking point,Now,as if to add fuel to fire,the unexpected happened.I had instructed my faithful friend,the HDD,to download something,through the night.Though not in it's best health,it had agreed to do so without any complaints.As I was having a deep sleep with sweet dreams,little did I know that my HDD was having a nightmare of a time.Death came instantly in the form of a powercut.HDD's best friend,The UPS,tried to keep his friend alive by giving him backup power.But,it could hold it's own only for 5 minutes.By the time I knew something was wrong,it was too late.My HDD had become a memory..... I don't have words in my literary armoury to explain the grief that I feel at the bereavement of my beloved HDD.The whole of Kerala went into mourning on the fateful.Computers all over the state went into hibernation mode for 1 minute to pay homage to the departed head.Meanwhile,the state police has registered a case of unnatural death.Coming shortly after the death of Manoj's HDD,investigators feel that there might be a conspiracy and that there might be a killer on the loose.Even while all this was happening,nothing could calm me down...not even the assurance from the manufacturing orphanage that they would replace the HDD with a new one. Anyway,whatever has happened,has happened.I cannot turn back the wheel of time and undo the events that occured.Maybe,inorder to pledge their allegiance to my endless tears,the heavens too opened their doors.Today,I look up towards the sky and hope that my HDD's head is resting in pieces.

Revving up the engine....Waiting for the green light!!!

2005-07-27T11:14:00.000-07:00

It is strange…People always say that they are writing down things in a blog. I feel it is a wrong usage. You write things down generally on a piece of a paper. On an internet page, you probably type things in. But, again, the word “write” has got lots of different meanings associated with it. It is not just about writing on a medium. When a person decides to avenge another person, he makes a statement, “Write it down! I will hunt you down!!!!”. But, does he actually write it down? NO…..When a person finally realizes that he is never going to back the money someone owes him, he says “Write it off!!!” But, does he make a note of it? NO. So, it is just a relative usage meant to indicate that you are trying to channelize your thoughts and record them onto some medium, from where it could be easily accessed. So, it is about permanent storage of your thoughts!!!. This blog is also a medium for me to store my thoughts….something I would like to call RAM or Regular Access Memory!!!

When I decided to start a blog, I was contemplating about the topics to write. For me, thoughts are like the huge wall of water applying pressure on the dam, which is my mind. Yesterday, I just put a small hole in the structure to allow the water to trickle through. I am not sure how strong the dam is and how efficient it is in withstanding the pressure of my complex thoughts. As long as it does not rain on the valleys of my disturbed mind, I can expect a steady flow. I hope the weather remains sunny and clear and not dark gloomy with the unforeseen mishaps that happen in my life. With the water coming out in a controlled manner, I hope to irrigate and nourish the fields, which are your minds and ensure a good harvest or in your case, a good reading experience.

The topics which crossed my mind in the first place, were all either too complicated for normal people to understand and appreciate or too weird. The sudden explosion of thoughts had in them, sparks of death, supernatural experiences, magic, Satanism and other extremely negative thoughts. I was sure that my friends would immediately associate it with the dark life I had some years back. But, let me ask them something. How do you differentiate between positive and negative? Is it an action or the result of that action that is negative? Have you ever thought about the dual nature of these two entities, which we call positive and negative?

For example, I remember my friends trying to discourage me from a venture because they felt that I would never be able to do it and that it would be disappointing if I failed. But, on the contrary, the negative strategy of my friends urged me to become more adamant and I did that task better than I expected. Here, a negative action led to a positive result.
Again, my friends used to really envy a person’s bike riding skills and used to praise him about his control and speed. This led to the person feeling proud about his skills and made him overconfident and careless. One small error finally led to a broken ribcage and fractured leg. Here, a positive action led to a negative result. Now, comes the interesting part where we see that it could happen in a parallel way also, where a negative action leads to negative result and positive action leads to positive result. Even though, the entities are two, we have four definite and different combinations.

Let me sign off for the day with a quote…

It is a known fact….
Life is not a pact….
So,Think before you act….
Keep your mind intact!!!

Love & Peace

Know me...

2005-07-26T12:27:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone...

Actions speak louder than words...
But, the pen is mightier than the sword!!!

I am a lost soul in this green planet. Searching for a foothold in this sanitarium that we call our home. Words are losing it's meaning as relations are reduced to mere formalities. Self interest is the order of the day. I am really afraid of making a friend now after a lot of experiences. So, I decided one day that I can make my thoughts my friends....make this blog the stage...and my words my speech....So, you all can read what swirls around in the deep chasms of mind!!!

Love & Peace